Hushed Voices, Secrets Untold

Giving women a voice, one day at a time

Veil of Secrecy

I made the decision to put my blog address on my social network page so that my family could read about the important work I am doing and read about my life passion; helping other women who have suffered domestic violence, giving them a voice and removing the veil of secrecy (stigma) attached to domestic violence. He asked me why I had not done it before and my response was that most of my family did not know about the abuse I had suffered at the hands of my ex-husband.

He was surprised and as soon as it came out of my mouth, I thought wow, they don’t know. Had I kept it a secret to protect myself from judgment from my family, to save myself from a ton of questions, to protect my children? I really did not know the answer to that. Then I went away to the mountains and I had time to reflect on that very question.

I had my answer. I was protecting my family from the ugliness that is domestic violence.

Domestic violence still today has a terrible stigma that is attached to the victims and their pain and suffering. Domestic violence victims are still hanging their heads in shame and are afraid to get help and talk to others about their pain.

In protecting my family, I missed an opportunity to talk to my extended family about my experiences, and how to prevent them. I have young female cousins that I am sure their parents have not talked to about domestic violence. I also missed an opportunity to share how I survived, got help and changed my life. Therefore, I listed my blog address so maybe my cousins can read about my experiences through social media.

I started my blog on domestic violence with the hope that I could reach more victims and let them see they have a voice and there is help. We can work together to lift the veil of secrecy, by bringing this subject out in the open, discussing it with our families, sharing experiences with our youths and working together to make the consequences for causing so much pain, and suffering, greater than they are today.

I encourage all of you, if you have been abused and managed to leave and change your life, to share your stories with other women, so that they too may be empowered by your decisions and success. If you are hurting there is information here to help you.

Let’s start today to life the veil of secrecy and stop the violence, one woman at a time.


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